How do you get over regret in life? That’s a question I wanted to ask medical experts, psychologists and people who have successfully overcome regret themselves, and I have created this page to list all the great and helpful responses that people submitted. If you’re struggling with getting over regret and you can’t speak to a psychologist right now, it’s my hope that some of the advice here will be useful to you.
Below are all the credible responses I’ve received. In my opinion, a lot of it is excellent food for thought for anyone suffering from regret, and there’s probably at least one submission here that can help you (whether it’s from a professional or someone sharing their personal story).
If you’re qualified to speak in this area or have a story to share about how you overcame regret, please also make a submission. 🙂
I think the key for people who regret a decision they made (either to do something or not to do something) is to see that event as an opportunity to learn something they wouldn't have otherwise learned.
That doesn't mean a poor choice doesn't have consequences. It also doesn't mean we shouldn't own our mistakes and make amends to those hurt by them. But every mistake is an opportunity to learn something we might not have learned otherwise. The real key is simply not making the same mistakes over and over again.
As an example, I had an affair in 2013. It devastated my wife, of course, and almost completely derailed our marriage. I certainly had to own that mistake and work really hard to earn my wife's trust back. That took the better part of 2 years to completely recover (the affair was 2 months).
But in that recovery time (and beyond), I quit drinking alcohol and began to really understand how some of the traumatic events of my childhood had led me to sabotage almost every romantic relationship I had been involved in as an adult.
I would never had recognized those things if the affair hadn't led me down that path. That doesn't mean I don't regret the affair, but I'm grateful for the lessons I learned from it. Fast forward to 2020 and my relationship with my wife is better than it ever was before and we welcomed our 3rd child in 2017.
--Jeff Campbell, newmiddleclassdad.com
The best way to overcome regret is to accept that it's all over and that you can’t do anything about it. I’ve learned this personally when I failed to ask out the girl of my dreams back in college. We were very compatible and there was chemistry between us. But for some reason, I chickened out when it came to confessing my feelings. She got a boyfriend a few months later, and I regret never telling her how I feel.
Today I’m married to a supportive wife and 3 children. I am perfectly content with my life but there are times when I regret not telling her how I feel back then. However, I’ve accepted that’s it’s in the past now and we both live different lives. There’s no point in worrying about the past.
--Anh Trinh, GeekWithLaptop
I’ve gained and lost over one hundred pounds four times in my life. And for the longest time, I was filled with regret about it. Every time I’d lose the weight, I’d gain it back.
I’d regret it any time I gained the weight back.
And I’d regret that I was ever overweight any time I’d lose the weight.
That regret turned to shame. Shame for being overweight, or shame for having been overweight.
But then something happened this last time. I started to look at things differently. Instead of being regretful that I was ever that big, I don’t even think about that anymore. I just focus on how I did this incredible thing of losing so much weight. So instead of feeling regret and shame, I feel pride and victory.
And that’s been a huge factor in me keeping the weight off for what seems like real this time. I don’t regret having been overweight anymore. It was a learning experience and something I’m proud to have battled back from.
--Baldric Shyer, Teetotally Awesome
Whoops! You screwed up royally by behaving in a manner that caused great distress to you and your loved ones. Here are a few things you can do to get over regrets in life:
1. Accept that you are fallible: No one is perfect including you. You are part of the species that make mistakes every day. Your regret shows that you care which means you are impassioned. However, regret that spins out of control can negatively impact your life. Hence, use an affirmation. It could be something like this: I'm a human being and making mistakes is normal.
2. Question the self-hatred: The past cannot be changed but you can change the self-loathing. Ask how is that helping you, the situation, and the people around you and if it is not, replace that regret with self-love.
3. Purge the negative self-talk: Negative self-talk can become automatic and it is imperative to catch it when you're in the act of doing it. Hear what you say to yourself. Identify what's wrong with it and remove it altogether.
4. Practice Gratitude: Start a journal and write four things you are grateful for each day the moment you wake up and right before you drift off to sleep. This will instill in you a feeling of positivity and appreciation and you would gradually become calmer and happier.
--Girish Dutt Shukla, girishduttshukla.com
As a psychologist and someone who had things I looked back at in my own life with regret, I am honored to share with you the most powerful way I've learned to overcome regret for myself and others.
Realizing that our perspectives about situations change as time moves on is very important. That can open us to remembering that at the time we experienced something we now regret our perspective on it and our self-justification for going through it probably felt right to us. Then, as we continue down life's road, the outcome of that experience and/or going through other experiences can changes our perspective(s) on many things. So just because we see something differently now, it doesn't mean we were wrong then.
Also, if we can truly see how we made a big mistake, it is important to remember that like everyone else, we are human, to forgive ourselves and use our recognition of the mistake we made to understand our reasoning at the time and forgive ourselves. Forgiveness has been researched in terms of the impact it has on us psychologically and even on our body's physiology and proven to emit positive changes in both ways.
If we also choose to use past experiences, regretful or not, as opportunities from which to learn how to improve our approaches to life, decision making and reduce our reactivity we feel better about ourselves and life overall, too.
--Roselyn G. Smith, PhD, roselynsmithphd.com
I lived with regrets about my life for so many years that it nearly killed me. I suffered from low-self esteem from childhood into my early adulthood. Growing up I never thought that I was good enough and because I was looked at as the strong one, people didn't really take me seriously when I would tell them I was depressed or not happy. I heard all the time: LaTersa just pray about it, you're a strong girl. I learned at an early age how to suppress my true feelings and cover it up by being outgoing and very smart academically. I became so motivated to be successful because I thought that it would fix the way I actually felt about myself.
During my early adulthood, those same nagging feeling of not being good enough or feeling worthy would always come back to haunt me when I got a broken heart or a relationship ended. Every inch of me always lived with the regret of why I had to go through all the bullying and nasty things in my life? Why I had to become suicidal and end up in the psych ward? For years, I was ashamed and just lived with a lot of regrets.
It wasn't until I really got tired of my own mess that I began to do something about my life. I will share with you 3 things you can begin to do right now that will help you to move your life forward:
1) Realize that you only did what you knew how to do: During the experiences that you've experienced, you didn't know to do anything different. You only did what you were taught or what you seen in your environment. If you were molested or raped, know that it was not your fault. You have to get to a place where you begin to walk out of your history so that you can get to all the wonderful things that are in store for you.
2) Forgive yourself & others: When you truly get tired of where you are and listening to the replays of all the hurts in your life, you will have to forgive. At your core, you have to forgive yourself and those who have hurt you in any way. This will free you up and allow you to walk out of your pain into something else that is beautiful. When you hold on to your past/regrets, you paralyze yourself in that very moment. You have to release it so you can be free. Remember, forgiveness is NOT for the other people, its a gift you truly deserve and give to yourself.
Here is an exercise I want you to do: Grab your favorite journal and pen and write a letter to every person that has ever hurt you. You can choose to mail it to them or you can bury it. Either way, you are choosing to release yourself from the situation. It's time to bury it once in for all. Then, I want you to pray a prayer of blessings over that individual or individuals for a healthy and prosperous life. Be sincere about it. Now, you might have to do this several times before your brain really get it, but I'm telling you, you will feel like a million bucks. You will feel so lite like a huge burden has been lifted off your shoulders.
3) Write a new story: In order for you to walk out of your past, you got to have something to look forward to. You need something that motivates you to keep living. When you set new goals for yourself and you go really hard. Slowly but surely, you begin to talk less and less about your past and more about your goals and dreams. Remember, Jeremiah 29:11 For God has a great future and an expected end for your life. This verse has gotten me through some really tough times in my life and I want to pass it on to you.
--LaTersa Blakely, LaTersa Blakely Enterprises
Holding onto any negative emotion is unhealthy, stressful, and usually leads to a downward spiral. Festered negative emotions can often also trick your mind into accepting these feelings as normal which can result in a total negative outlook.
One way to help to prevent that negativity from taking over is to acknowledge your regrets and really own that which you may regret. Talking about what has been learned and how to prevent it from being repeated. If there are opportunities to make amends for that which is regretted, it should be considered. Whether you talk it out with a therapist or write it out, the feelings need to be acknowledged and dealt with accordingly.
--Claire Barber, Treeological
How to Get Over Regrets: Any thinking person with a modicum of compassion has regrets. Here are my five tips for dealing with regrets:
1. Feel the Hurt And Let It Go. For decades I have used this statement in response to people's petty complaints and gripes, but when it comes to regret you really need to follow this advice. You should feel bad about things you did that you wish you hadn't or vice versa but you can't let it consume you.
2. Apologize...Before It's Too Late. Don't wait for the funeral to inventory all the things you regret in your relationship with the decedent. If you regret mistreating someone call them and apology. They may not be in a forgiving frame of mine, but like as not, they won't be harboring any major grudge. And if they are...well you did your best and now it's there burden to bear.
3. Forgive Yourself. When my mother died, my father gathered my six siblings and I together and said, there will be no self-pity, there will be no regrets. Your mother knew that each of you loved her and she loved each of you. Don't spoil that memory by dwelling on how things could have been different.
4. Learn From Your Regrets. Nothing from which you learn can be considered a negative, but sometimes you have to look deeper to see the deep moral lessons in the thing you regret.
5. Know that regret is a positive. When through action or omission you harm someone and feel regret, it encourages you to do better. Regret is not a pleasant emotion, but regret can cause you to avoid behaving similarly in future situations. So it's okay to regret something as long as (where ever possible) you make amends and move on a better, wiser person.
--Philip La Duke, philladuke.wordpress.com
When it comes to regret, it's important to recognize that like any emotion, regret serves a positive purpose when used correctly. Unfortunately it's also an emotion that's easy to misuse.
Ultimately, regret serves two functions.
1) It's our brain's way of telling us not to repeat something we've done (or didn't do).
2) It's our brains way of saying to make amends or correct a past mistake if possible.
If we already feel bad, have made amends or are unable to make amends due to circumstances out of our control - regret serves us no purpose. Remembering that can be helpful.
Another thought on regret.
When you think about it, regret is our brain's way of telling us that we should've acted differently, telling us that if we had the knowledge we had today and the opportunity to do it differently, we would.
If that's the case, why is is fair to hold the past version of you as accountable as today's version of you which has the seen consequences of your actions? That's not to say we're not responsible for our actions but it is to say there's two different people involved. There's the version of you who has seen how things play out and the version of you who hasn't. If you can honestly answer that you would do things differently, it's likely unfair for you to be holding the past version of you accountable for something you've only now come learn.
--Noam Dinovitz, Dinovitz Counseling
In respects to your query on how to overcome regret, I have a substantial amount of experience both professionally and personally.
I was in a terrible, loveless marriage for over 9 years. I stayed and stayed. Daily I would imagine what my life would have been like if I had walked away from the man that ultimately brought me to my knees in 2014. I imagined a different man, a different family, and I was even willing to concede having different children if it meant I would be married to someone amazing!
Then I hired a life coach and she changed everything for me. She asked me, How was this man a perfect choice for you given what you believed about yourself at the time you chose him? Boom! Perfect? Really? He felt the opposite of perfect but once I gave myself permission to look, I saw all the answers. I chose him because he was the exact opposite of the man who basically left me at the altar 2 years prior. He was perfect because I was 29 and thinking time was running out and he was 39 with the same conversation. He was perfect because I didn't believe I was worthy of being loved and he basically left me alone with no affection or connection for the 10 years we were together, fulfilling my belief that I was an unworthy piece of shit! I saw that choosing him is what ultimately brought me enough pain that I was willing to ask for help. When I finally asked for help, I grew myself up to a woman who knows her value, is full of self love, and will never again sacrifice her happiness for the sake of just being in a relationship. I learned to stand on my own two feet and love my own life without a man in it.
A few years later, I found myself feeling regret over my kids having divorced parents. They would say things like, I wish you and daddy still lived in the same house so we didn't have to go back and forth between you and we got to see daddy more. Ughh! It was like a knife through the heart. Until I read Elizabeth Lesser's book, Broken Open. There was a passage in it where she is asking a clairvoyant about how her leaving her husband will destroy him and her children. The clairvoyant says something to the effect that her husband and children came to this earth to learn a specific set of lessons that will fulfill them and their souls. She goes on to say that unless the woman leaves her husband, none of them will not be able to learn what they came here to learn because it all hinges on the divorce and the pain they will feel from that event. That pain will be 'break them open' and healing that pain will teach them what they need to know. For some reason, this rang true for me. It was similar to understanding that choosing my ex husband is why I'm now a worthy and self loving woman. So, why wouldn't it be true for my kids? Done deal. Kids will ultimately be fine!
Regret is what happens when we hang onto the notion that somehow we can change the past. We play and re-play the scenario and imagine how it could be different; how we could be different; what we 'should' have done. In each of those scenarios, we are looking with a different lens because inevitably we have grown since that point, we are at a different angle now so looking back it's a lot easier to see how we could have changed the outcome. Changing the outcome is not ultimately what we are seeking. Ultimately, we want peace that our lost or missed opportunity was actually a blessing or 'the way it was supposed to be.' I tell clients, If it was supposed to be any other way, it would have been. And I ask them, Do you know how I know that? Because it's the way that it is.
--Kathryn Pirozzoli, Kathryn Pirozzoli Coaching
There are two three steps that help most people not just move beyond regret, but to use it effectively to become a better person. These include:
ONE: Own it. Embrace your responsibility for what occurred. The most common mistake people make is to make excuses for why it really was not their fault. Or why it is understandable that they behaved poorly. The better choice is to accept one's responsibility. That is the beginning of gaining control so that the same mistake is not made again.
TWO: Apologize to those that were hurt by your actions. This is difficult. It requires humility (not humiliation, just humility). It requires that you become vulnerable - the person may not accept your apology. But that is not the point. You cannot control whether your apology is accepted. You can only control whether you do the right thing, which is to extend the apology.
THREE: If amends (compensation of some sort) is justified this should be the next step. These first three steps are all part of standing up and taking the mantle of responsibility: accepting that what you did was wrong, then apologizing, then making amends. Going through these three steps is often liberating. It may not feel so prior to walking through those steps, but at the end most people feel significantly lighter.
FOUR: The last step is to learn from the mistake that led to regret. Ask yourself What have I learned from this that can make me a better person? Be as specific as you can (that may mean rephrasing the question so that it becomes What have I learned from this that can make me a better ... fill in the blank with husband, wife, parent, friend, employer, etc. Then write down one or two things you can do it to effect that sort of change. In this way the very thing that first led to the regret becomes a springboard for good.
After completing those four steps you make a conscious effort to move on. You've done all you can, and you've turned something that created pain into something that creates growth and is positive.
--Forrest Talley, Invictus Psychological Services
In response to How to get over regrets in life: I've made lots of mistakes in the past by investing into the wrong businesses and getting into the wrong relationships which resulted in me losing quite a lot of money and having issues with my mental and physical well-being.
Yeah, I regretted ever commiting to those for quite a while, but the experiences and lessons I learned aftermath is something I'd never acquire if I didn't go through them.
Personally, what helped in me getting over those regrets and forging ahead were nothing special but accepting the moment and looking forward to a positive and better future ahead.
I know, it wasn't easy to be honest.
But once I saw the thousand differences I could make if I stop lamenting on the past and focusing on the limitless opportunities the future has - I got over it by working and taking action to make tomorrow a greater success.
After a while, I actually discovered that it all happened for the good.
Like they say you miss 100% of the shots you don't make. I doubt if I would have gotten to this stage of my life if I didn't make those mistakes.
So, at the end of the day it's not really a mistake to be regretful about - it's the lesson we got from it which is to be applied on our journey in life.
--Khris Steven, Khrisdigital
For a long time, I have regretted not going abroad to a medical school. At one point, I did receive an offer but couldn’t decide to leave my family that needed me at the time. For a while, I felt like I had missed a golden opportunity and completely lost motivation to start studying in my own city. The only thing on my mind was that a chance like doesn’ repeat twice. At one point, I realized that I had to cut these thoughts and make a step forward. I made a list of all the good things I would have if I studied at home. Plus, I really went back to the origin - did I care about medicine as such or about studying abroad. The answer was very easy. I’ve always wanted to be a doctor and I couldn’t let one missed opportunity stop me from achieving my dream. It took me some time to accept the facts, but I eventually got used to the circumstances and started medical school. What helped me overcome my regret was going back to the origin and looking at the bigger picture. I couldn’t allow one mistake to dictate the rest of my career.
--Dr Nikola Djordjevic MD, HealthCareers
As a Los Angeles-based clinical psychologist, I offer:
1. Very few people have no regrets in life. The first step is to accept that with hindsight, you made a less than ideal choice.
2. We tend to idealize the past. E.g., I should have married him, not dumped him. Biggest mistake of my life. Yet, if you could go back in time, you might be able to see that at that time, you did make the best choice possible given what you knew/had/wanted at that time.
3. Forgive yourself. Easier said than one, but after accepting your mistake, perhaps there are some amends to make to another person/s. Do that, if appropriate, and then begin to forgive yourself.
4. Seek professional help if you get stuck anywhere along this path.
--Nancy B. Irwin, drnancyirwin.com
In decades of working with people at the end of life, I repeatedly witnessed the way we humans are drawn to look back on what we've done and not done, longing to make peace with the past. We review our lives, try to figure out what it meant that we walked the planet, and take stock of what was truly important, what mattered the most. The words I've most often heard spoken as life ebbs and we're stripped to our essence are: Thank you, I love you, and please forgive me/I forgive you.
Our regrets, I've realized, often stem from missed opportunities to express gratitude and love, or to extend forgiveness and acceptance to ourselves and others. And we needn't wait until our lives are nearly over to listen to those regrets and let them show us how to make ourselves whole. They're clues to what's been left unsaid, undone, un-actualized, unappreciated and unforgiven in our lives. Rather than a being a badge of shame or evidence of our irredeemable flaws, they're a starting point for the deep work of the soul that calls to you now.
How do you begin to do this healing, liberating work? Start by finding a photo of yourself from the time period, distant or recent, that you connect with your regret. Quietly sit with the photo and study the face of this person who made the decision or took the action that troubles you now and regard this earlier version of yourself with kindness. As you look into the eyes of your younger self, who may be a child or a world-weary 40-year-old, it's hard to assume that he or she knew what you do now and could have acted as you would today. This younger self did the best s/he could with the inner and outer resources s/he had at the time. Feel the truth of that. Look into the eyes of this person and with an open heart, say: Thank you. I love you. Please forgive me for any blame or shame I've attached to you. Know that I forgive you.
Now look with kindness and curiosity at the regret itself. What does the regret tell you about what you value? What choices could you make to honor that value right now? What does your regret tell you about what's gone undone or un-actualized in your life? What small step can you take to honor what's been abandoned?
Ask: Who needs to hear the words I love you from me? Whom do I need to thank? Whom do I need to forgive, or ask forgiveness of?
Make it your practice to follow the path that spirals out as you answer these questions. I can't tell you where it will lead, but I can promise that as you go, regret will loosen its hold and become a door into the life you're being called to live.
--Dr. Charles Garfield, The Shanti Project
It's easy to look back and beat yourself up for the mistakes you've committed. However, that leads to an unproductive cycle that causes you to be stuck in a rut of feeling negative.
Instead of regretting what you did, the first step to coping is to reflect. Think about
- why you regret doing what you did, and
- how else you could've reacted.
This allows you to look back on the events and be better prepared to deal with similar situations in the future.
The next step is to acknowledge and internalise the fact that failure is perceived. I live by this quote There is no success or failure. You are the only one who can make failure feel like failure.
A lot of times we set expectations for ourselves to meet, and when we don't meet those expectations, we feel like we have failed. But to be truly happy, we have to be able to forgive ourselves for the mistakes we make. As long as you acknowledge this, you'll be in better control of your happiness; you'll be able to accept your regret and perceive it in a positive light to improve yourself as an individual.
--Bernice Quek, New Age Polish
Often deep regrets come from painful experiences of lost love. Today I'd like to share one of mine with you. The name of my lover: piano.
At the age of eleven, I took my first piano lesson. I was hooked. The keys, sounds, and the experience of making music were so seductive. My affair with the instrument continued until my senior year of high school when things began to get rocky.
I felt that my interview with the head of the music department at a local university was a sign: my future was as a piano performance major. All I needed to do was keep practicing hard.
Unfortunately, my career as a star classical pianist was not...in the stars. Soon I had a moderate case of tendonitis and my doctor prescribed me rest and ice. As my hope for a future in music began to fade, so the piano began to fade from my life.
To this day, there is not a loss I regret more than piano. It was my first love. My first passion. My first big dream. How have I overcome this regret? I haven't. I am overcoming it. It is a process, and for all I know it could last a lifetime.
You can begin the process too, and I urge you to begin today with the first step: identifying. You must first identify what you regret. Clarify what experiences birthed this feeling inside of you.
Then, you must acknowledge the regret. Give your feeling of regret room to exist. Don't shame yourself for feeling your feelings. You might compound the negative affects of your regret if you treat it like a monster lurking inside you.
Acknowledging must be an ongoing process, but once you've acknowledged your regret and you feel ready, move on to analyzing.
Analyze. Don't overdo it. The goal is not to think yourself to death, but to delve deeper into what caused this experience to result in the feeling of regret. As you continue to analyze your regret, create more positive constructions. How can this experience better you?
Time to let go. I know. It's harder than it sounds. No one promised you this would be easy. But you are capable. Letting go takes time, but pro-tip: remember not to actively hold on.
Why can't I let go? Why can't I let go? You might cry as you actively cling to the idealistic feeling of pain and regret that is holding you back. Pain is comforting. It gives us an excuse to rest instead of trying. You've got this. Be free.
--Erin Gottes, Erin Living Leisurely
Unfortunately, we cannot turn back time to undo what we did that led toward us feeling regret; however, every passing moment is an opportunity to work through this feeling.
First and foremost, it is important to use the mistake or wrong-doing as a learning opportunity. Consider what went wrong and what could be done to correct the action moving forward.
Second, it is important to make amends whenever possible. This has an impact on alleviating stress undergone by all parties impacted--yourself included. Once the lesson has been learned and amends were made, it is important to take corrective action to ensure that it does not happen again.
Above all, it is important to work to move forward. Be more mindful of your interactions and how they impact others. Holding what happened above yourself without taking action may lead toward a negative spiral that may have otherwise been avoided. Should you struggle to follow these steps or find them impractical given your situation, that is when it is beneficial to seek assistance--whether with a mental health professional, through group support, or wherever you feel most comfortable.
--Matt Glowiak, Choosing Therapy
FORGIVE YOURSELF: Although this sounds simple, it can be quite challenging. Forgiving ourselves for mistakes we've made...opportunities we've missed or even misguided decisions, can leave us with feelings of incompetence, sadness or even depression if not properly dealt with.
Being able to open your mouth and say I forgive you (insert name) can be the beginning of healing for many. It allows us to look at ourselves as human. And guess what...humans...make mistakes. Humans...miss the mark sometimes. And humans need forgiveness.
When the feelings of regret surface, go back to that same forgiveness statement, reminding yourself that what you did is now in the past...unable to be changed and that you have forgiven yourself for that action. With time...the regret will begin to fall away, until you are able to walk in complete healing.
OWN IT: The worse thing that we can do with regret is pretend like we're not responsible for that action. There is no moving forward if we are not willing to admit the part we played. We must be honest with ourselves. We must openly admit and OWN our part. If we're in the wrong for the breakdown of a relationship...own it. For missed opportunities due to our own unpreparedness...own it. Whatever the situation...own the part we've played...learn from it...so that we are able to completely let it go.
GRAB THE LESSON: Many times regret sticks with us, because we refuse to learn the lesson that regret can teach. When we learn to see things differently, it allows us the opportunity to respond to it differently. Instead of looking at the regret as something completely unforgivable or something that you can never escape, look at it as a hard lesson. Grab the learning aspects that came from that unproductive decision. Make a commitment not to walk that same path and/or to help others in a similar predicament. By taking focus off of the regret and choosing to redirect how we look at it...this will help to not wallow in what can not be changed.
--Shelley Meche'tte, Certified Life Purpose Coach, author of 70 Days of Happy: Life Is Better When You Smile
Regret often involves rumination over a decision that resulted in an unfavorable outcome. Maybe you said something you didn’t mean, hurt someone you love, or didn’t act when you should have. Your ruminating over the decision might even lead to more mental turmoil than the unfavorable outcome itself. However, there are ways to reduce this overwhelming feeling. As cliche as it sounds, it’s important to learn from the situation. Think about potential lessons you can take away to avoid making a similar choice in the future. Additionally, whether or not you prescribe to the notion that “everything happens for a reason,” there’s comfort in the idea nonetheless. Maybe your regret will turn to gratitude as every decision made leads to another open door. The outcome may not have been what you wanted at the time, but you’ll likely realize why it had to happen.
--Dr. Lisa Lovelace, Synergy eTherapy
Throughout of my life, I have experienced countless regrets, both professional and personal. The biggest one by far was letting my work-life overpower my home life. To deal with the regret, I had first to recognize that I was not perfect, forgive myself for letting it get that far and finally take deliberate steps to try and rectify the situation.
As a dad of four kids, that meant having breakfast with my family every morning. I also made it a point to pursue work/life balance via different methods, such as working from home occasionally. I am now one of the staunchest supporters of work/life balance, not just for myself but for my employees as well. I will always carry the regret with me as I missed moments I will never get back. However, regret no longer overwhelms me because I used my mistake as a teaching tool.
So, in a nutshell, dealing with regret requires that you:
- Forgive yourself for past mistakes by admitting you are both human and imperfect
- Use the mistake as a teaching tool to help you do better in the future
- Understand that you are continually growing and as such the regret-causing error does not define you
--Reuben Yonatan, GetVoIP
One of the best ways to overcome regret in life is to realize that while you can't change the past, you can make your future. This is a realization I had that helped me a lot with my past regret. One of my biggest regrets is that I didn't travel more when I was younger. Now that I've spent the past few years travelling all over the world, I realize how much it's helped me in my life and my business, and how much it's broadened my horizons and perspectives. If I started traveling younger, I could've experienced these benefits years ago.
However, instead of worrying and dwelling over my past regrets and mistakes, I instead focus on how I can make the present and future better. I may not have travelled much when I was younger, but now, I travel all over the world and get to experience amazing things and meet incredible people. I can't change my past, but I can make sure I do my best to make the present and future amazing, which is fully in my control.
--Chane Steiner, Crediful